So the other day I had this guy come up to my chair for a hair cut.
I asked him what would he like done with his hair and he just stood there and said...
"I'm not a man of many words .... but a picture is worth a thousand..."
With that he handed me a photo of a hair cut as he slowly sat down in my chair with a blank expression on his face.
AMAZING!
So during the cut I asked him if the length of his hair worked for him because its different from seeing it in the photo to actually wearing it.
What does he say?
"There are instructions on the back of the photo."
Then continue to sit there motionless with out saying a single word.
Full moon last week...
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Thursday, September 1, 2011
some things never change...
So its been a while since I've actually taken the time to update.
whoops...
On Canada's day one of my best girlfriends and I decided to go on an adventure two hours away to find an abandoned school house, only to discover after getting there that it was burnt to the ground.
We had our pups with us so we decided to just let them run around the field of the new school that was built over the old one.
We let the beasts out to run and my pup sees a massive dumpster and does a b line right for it and tried to jump in.
Oh I forgot to mention she is from Louisiana and was found in a dumpster as a baby...
Silly dumpster baby...
whoops...
On Canada's day one of my best girlfriends and I decided to go on an adventure two hours away to find an abandoned school house, only to discover after getting there that it was burnt to the ground.
We had our pups with us so we decided to just let them run around the field of the new school that was built over the old one.
We let the beasts out to run and my pup sees a massive dumpster and does a b line right for it and tried to jump in.
Oh I forgot to mention she is from Louisiana and was found in a dumpster as a baby...
Silly dumpster baby...
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
overly excited and drunk
The other day at work I did a full makeover on this woman.
Colour, foils, cut... it was really nice by the end of it all.
The lady was so excited she jumped up from my chair with her cape still on and kept running her hands through her hair saying how much she loved it and what an amazing job I did!
In the heat of the moment she reached back to grab my "elbow" but missed it by a long shot and grabbed my breast for a good 10 seconds.
She even turned around and said "Oh my! I thought that was your elbow!" As she still had a death grip on my left breast...
Last time I checked elbows were bony... breasts are not...
About an hour later a woman does a staggered zig zag walk and announced to the salon that she needs her bangs cut.
I bring her over to my chair... which took her quite some time as she was walking as if she was trying to roll her ankles with every step she took.
She finally sat in my chair as she tells me "I have to confess I tried cutting my own bangs with a dull pair of kitchen scissors after drinking a bottle of wiskey...."
Oh boy....
I quickly got her out of my chair as the smell of alcohol was burning my nostrils.
(Its funny I can never smell alcohol on people but this woman smelled as if she was bathing in it.)
Definitely a full moon...
Colour, foils, cut... it was really nice by the end of it all.
The lady was so excited she jumped up from my chair with her cape still on and kept running her hands through her hair saying how much she loved it and what an amazing job I did!
In the heat of the moment she reached back to grab my "elbow" but missed it by a long shot and grabbed my breast for a good 10 seconds.
She even turned around and said "Oh my! I thought that was your elbow!" As she still had a death grip on my left breast...
Last time I checked elbows were bony... breasts are not...
About an hour later a woman does a staggered zig zag walk and announced to the salon that she needs her bangs cut.
I bring her over to my chair... which took her quite some time as she was walking as if she was trying to roll her ankles with every step she took.
She finally sat in my chair as she tells me "I have to confess I tried cutting my own bangs with a dull pair of kitchen scissors after drinking a bottle of wiskey...."
Oh boy....
I quickly got her out of my chair as the smell of alcohol was burning my nostrils.
(Its funny I can never smell alcohol on people but this woman smelled as if she was bathing in it.)
Definitely a full moon...
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
kid shirt
After talking to this one guy for several weeks I decided to meet up with him.
During our chats it seemed to be a lot of twenty questions play in which he answered to his own questions. Every question he would reply to had a 90% chance of his answer being the exact same as mine or merly a quotation of my online dating profile.
Needless to say I figured he's far from the typical guy I date so maybe there is something else there besides the repetitive answers to twenty questions.
So the day finally comes and I meet him. The dinner was actually surprisingly going quite well. When the bill came we split it, only after he put me on the spot asking if I wanted him to pay for it or if we could split it.
After it was all paid for he asked if we wanted to walk around the mall after. Kind of strange for a first date to walk around a mall... but I just went with it.
So we get to a popular clothing store and he asks if I'd mind if we went in to check some things out.
Not a problem!
So we go in and hes on a "b line" for the mens section and then began trying on various plaid scarves (which coincidently enough reminded me of this guy that was in a colour class I went to a month back for work, who was dressed up as a "gay pirate").
As I slowly try to distract myself from laughing he says "I'm going to take a quick peak in the kids section."
I think to my self "what an awesome guy going to buy something for his nephew" ( as which he told me earlier that evening that he has a nephew with a birthday coming up)... OH BOY!
Was I ever wrong....
He then said to me that he can fit into kids t-shirts... and he wanted to see what kind of styles were out...
Did I forget to mention he was fairly built as well?
I tried to put it out of my mind....
as he was a nice guy.
I've been told that I'm picky when it comes to men so I thought maybe I'm over analyzing this guy wearing little boy t-shirts.
...
Yes we did go out a few more times.
Each of those times he never once even offered to buy me a drink, or to drive out to my place to visit.
The last time I saw him I drove out to his place, then took my car out to a restaurant where he proceeded to get pissed drunk in front of me, asked for separate bills when the waitress came around. Needless to say that evening ended rather abruptly.
Quite some time has gone by and I've been receiving random messages from him saying he was walking around and "casually" went passed my work to stop in and chat with me... however I've always been busy.
He also wanted to take me out for a drink... (or was it I take him out?)
This "casual" strolling pass my work thing occurred two times within a week...
I should also add in here that he apologized if he ever upset me.
During our chats it seemed to be a lot of twenty questions play in which he answered to his own questions. Every question he would reply to had a 90% chance of his answer being the exact same as mine or merly a quotation of my online dating profile.
Needless to say I figured he's far from the typical guy I date so maybe there is something else there besides the repetitive answers to twenty questions.
So the day finally comes and I meet him. The dinner was actually surprisingly going quite well. When the bill came we split it, only after he put me on the spot asking if I wanted him to pay for it or if we could split it.
After it was all paid for he asked if we wanted to walk around the mall after. Kind of strange for a first date to walk around a mall... but I just went with it.
So we get to a popular clothing store and he asks if I'd mind if we went in to check some things out.
Not a problem!
So we go in and hes on a "b line" for the mens section and then began trying on various plaid scarves (which coincidently enough reminded me of this guy that was in a colour class I went to a month back for work, who was dressed up as a "gay pirate").
As I slowly try to distract myself from laughing he says "I'm going to take a quick peak in the kids section."
I think to my self "what an awesome guy going to buy something for his nephew" ( as which he told me earlier that evening that he has a nephew with a birthday coming up)... OH BOY!
Was I ever wrong....
He then said to me that he can fit into kids t-shirts... and he wanted to see what kind of styles were out...
Did I forget to mention he was fairly built as well?
I tried to put it out of my mind....
as he was a nice guy.
I've been told that I'm picky when it comes to men so I thought maybe I'm over analyzing this guy wearing little boy t-shirts.
...
Yes we did go out a few more times.
Each of those times he never once even offered to buy me a drink, or to drive out to my place to visit.
The last time I saw him I drove out to his place, then took my car out to a restaurant where he proceeded to get pissed drunk in front of me, asked for separate bills when the waitress came around. Needless to say that evening ended rather abruptly.
Quite some time has gone by and I've been receiving random messages from him saying he was walking around and "casually" went passed my work to stop in and chat with me... however I've always been busy.
He also wanted to take me out for a drink... (or was it I take him out?)
This "casual" strolling pass my work thing occurred two times within a week...
I should also add in here that he apologized if he ever upset me.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
fail
Here is a quick little msn convo I had with someone from a dating website...
*** says:
hey
Laura says:
hey whats up
*** says:
not too much you?
Laura says:
nothing much i should really get some laundry started
*** says:
boring
wanna come out later to watch the game?
Laura says:
im not into hockey or baseball
or which ever game your referring to
sorry darling
*** says:
i know its not really a sweet date but it would make my day
its playoffs darlin
k nevermind
Laura says:
sorry not really into hockey
thats very sweet of you to say tho
*** says:
baseball is gay by the way
Laura says:
my brother loves it....
*** says:
sweet
well if yu want you can take me to a jays game
*** says:
hey
Laura says:
hey whats up
*** says:
not too much you?
Laura says:
nothing much i should really get some laundry started
*** says:
boring
wanna come out later to watch the game?
Laura says:
im not into hockey or baseball
or which ever game your referring to
sorry darling
*** says:
i know its not really a sweet date but it would make my day
its playoffs darlin
k nevermind
Laura says:
sorry not really into hockey
thats very sweet of you to say tho
*** says:
baseball is gay by the way
Laura says:
my brother loves it....
*** says:
sweet
well if yu want you can take me to a jays game
Saturday, April 16, 2011
healthy
So I'm a single lady and like most singles I've ventured to online dating.
Most of my friends have moved out of the city and have either settled down or have conflicting schedules so it's totally hard to go out to meet potential suitors.
Anyways needless to say I have been out on a few dates.
Some are okay, some ended up as a possible friendship, but I'm not here to talk about those. Let's face it, the terrible ones are the best ones.
I meet one guy at a restaurant and everything seems to be okay except I feel nothing.
No worries, these things happen. Trial and error right?
We talk about whatever people talk about on their first encounters until our dinner comes to a close. I excuse my self to use the facilities and come back to find him on his phone.
He does not put the phone away, instead tells me about how these girls on this dating site message him all the time.
Nice.
After a few more minutes of him checking his emails from other girls I tell him that dinner was nice and perhaps we should ask for the bill.
The bill comes, he pays, then he tells me that he isn't ready to go home just yet.
I suggest to go out for coffee even though I really want to get the hell out of there.
My nice side wins.
We go out for coffee.
He tells me about how he moved to the other side of the country with an ex, she cheated on him, he beat the shit out of the guy she cheated on him with, trashed the place, took his dog and drove home in one sitting.
He was so angry!
He tells me more about how he tried to get things back in order by sometimes working out. All while checking his phone several more times for emails from other girls.
Then comes the finale...
The guy tells me out of the blue
"I pee neon green. It means I'm healthy from all the vitamins I take."
Needless to say this date was called promptly over.
First dates are like interviews. Trying to impress, nerves get the better of you and no one gets to see your true self.
But shit... no one likes to hear about your body functions...
Most of my friends have moved out of the city and have either settled down or have conflicting schedules so it's totally hard to go out to meet potential suitors.
Anyways needless to say I have been out on a few dates.
Some are okay, some ended up as a possible friendship, but I'm not here to talk about those. Let's face it, the terrible ones are the best ones.
I meet one guy at a restaurant and everything seems to be okay except I feel nothing.
No worries, these things happen. Trial and error right?
We talk about whatever people talk about on their first encounters until our dinner comes to a close. I excuse my self to use the facilities and come back to find him on his phone.
He does not put the phone away, instead tells me about how these girls on this dating site message him all the time.
Nice.
After a few more minutes of him checking his emails from other girls I tell him that dinner was nice and perhaps we should ask for the bill.
The bill comes, he pays, then he tells me that he isn't ready to go home just yet.
I suggest to go out for coffee even though I really want to get the hell out of there.
My nice side wins.
We go out for coffee.
He tells me about how he moved to the other side of the country with an ex, she cheated on him, he beat the shit out of the guy she cheated on him with, trashed the place, took his dog and drove home in one sitting.
He was so angry!
He tells me more about how he tried to get things back in order by sometimes working out. All while checking his phone several more times for emails from other girls.
Then comes the finale...
The guy tells me out of the blue
"I pee neon green. It means I'm healthy from all the vitamins I take."
Needless to say this date was called promptly over.
First dates are like interviews. Trying to impress, nerves get the better of you and no one gets to see your true self.
But shit... no one likes to hear about your body functions...
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
blow me
So last week this older "gentleman"came into our shop.
I noticed he had a shit load of gel in his hair and I had told him that I would have to shampoo it out before I cut his hair.
His response...
"I'll come back another day"
I told him it would literally take one minute and that the sinks were right beside us and it was included in the price.
I managed to wash and cut his hair.
After the cut I used my hair drier to remove any loose hairs.
I grabbed some gel to throw back in his hair when he barked out at me
"There is still hair all over my face. You are suppose to use the hair drier to remove that."
So i wipe off the gel that I'm holding to grab my hair drier to remove the FOUR pieces of white hair on his forehead.
I throw gel in his hair which apparently wasn't adequate enough for his liking so he started to glop it on himself.
I met with him at the cash only to have him tell me that i was "unprofessional" because their was hair on his sweater that I did not blow off with my hair drier.
He shook his head like a miserable old man muttering obscenities.
Blow me.
I noticed he had a shit load of gel in his hair and I had told him that I would have to shampoo it out before I cut his hair.
His response...
"I'll come back another day"
I told him it would literally take one minute and that the sinks were right beside us and it was included in the price.
I managed to wash and cut his hair.
After the cut I used my hair drier to remove any loose hairs.
I grabbed some gel to throw back in his hair when he barked out at me
"There is still hair all over my face. You are suppose to use the hair drier to remove that."
So i wipe off the gel that I'm holding to grab my hair drier to remove the FOUR pieces of white hair on his forehead.
I throw gel in his hair which apparently wasn't adequate enough for his liking so he started to glop it on himself.
I met with him at the cash only to have him tell me that i was "unprofessional" because their was hair on his sweater that I did not blow off with my hair drier.
He shook his head like a miserable old man muttering obscenities.
Blow me.
Saturday, March 26, 2011
shampoo?
So I just finished work and the stupidest thing happened.
I asked a guy if he wanted a shampoo before his hair cut.
He responded with
"No, I'm very clean."
HA!
I asked a guy if he wanted a shampoo before his hair cut.
He responded with
"No, I'm very clean."
HA!
Friday, March 25, 2011
pup scare
Whenever I hear this song it immediately reminds me of it startling my boxer I once had.
When the clip rolls and "HEY" is said immediately it would startle him and he would look up at me with his big doe eyes...
Christ I miss him...
When the clip rolls and "HEY" is said immediately it would startle him and he would look up at me with his big doe eyes...
Christ I miss him...
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
here is something different...
So I just found this song that was on a commercial...
I like it so I figured I'd share it
I like it so I figured I'd share it
feb
So this is going back about a month ago.
I had this girl come in for a hair cut with the most terrible eyebrows known to man kind.
It literally startled me.
It was as if she was trying to grow them back in and they were just specks all over with an existing thicker eyebrow in the middle of the cluster of hairs.
OK I admit I am an eyebrow critic...
Anywhoo... by the time I get her in my chair, I realize that her eyebrows are possibly the only thing "sane" about her.
She starts to tell me about her most amazing boyfriend.
They met on a dating website and they have the best relationship ever.
Even though that she works only two days a week she plans to move into a house with him and that he is going to drop everything in the town that he lives in to move out to her.
Lucky girl...
I asked where her boyfriend lives.
She tells me the name of a town thats about an hour and a half away that is notorious for sex and drugs.
I ask how often they see each other.
She said once every two weeks because she doesn't drive.
(no wonder the relationship is soo good)
She tells me that she is going to take the bus out to see him this upcoming weekend because its her birthday in two days.
I tried to tell her happy birthday before she manically cuts me off and snaps "Guess what?!? His birthday is in FEB too!"
I said oh yeah? pretty cool...
I know right? Who would have thought I was born in FEB... then my boyfriends birthday is in FEB... What are the odds?!
First off I cant seem to wrap my mind around why she thinks its crazy that someone else has their birthday in the same month as her...
Secondly why is she saying "feb"and not February!
She goes on talking about Feb and what a great time it is to be born in Feb and the odds of dating someone who was also born in Feb...
One of her friends comes in and sits in the empty station beside me who has equally terrible eyebrows and asks how her day is going.
My client starts to abruptly yell out
HEY GIRL FRIEND!!!! OH JUST GETTING THE ROYAL TREATMENT DONE...
she is literally talking the way a very flamboyant "queen" would be flipping her wrist back and forth and trying to snap her neck at the same time.
Curious... she wasn't talking like this prior to her friend coming in.
She goes on talking about how amazing her "bf" is while interrupting her friend at every possible chance she gets.
As I'm concentrating on my work just to get her out, I notice a coworker is shampooing her next client behind me talking about how its her birthday.
Immediately my client overheard this part and said "BIRHTDAY GIRLS IN THE HA-HOUSE!!"and starts pumping her fists in the air.
Who the fuck is this crazy brawd?! Were not at the jersey shore...
Uncontrollable out bursts tag teamed with sparatic neck movements.... it all really makes me question if there is something seriously wrong with this girl.
At the end of the cut she asks me where she can get her eyebrows fixed.
I gladly told her where to go.
I had this girl come in for a hair cut with the most terrible eyebrows known to man kind.
It literally startled me.
It was as if she was trying to grow them back in and they were just specks all over with an existing thicker eyebrow in the middle of the cluster of hairs.
OK I admit I am an eyebrow critic...
Anywhoo... by the time I get her in my chair, I realize that her eyebrows are possibly the only thing "sane" about her.
She starts to tell me about her most amazing boyfriend.
They met on a dating website and they have the best relationship ever.
Even though that she works only two days a week she plans to move into a house with him and that he is going to drop everything in the town that he lives in to move out to her.
Lucky girl...
I asked where her boyfriend lives.
She tells me the name of a town thats about an hour and a half away that is notorious for sex and drugs.
I ask how often they see each other.
She said once every two weeks because she doesn't drive.
(no wonder the relationship is soo good)
She tells me that she is going to take the bus out to see him this upcoming weekend because its her birthday in two days.
I tried to tell her happy birthday before she manically cuts me off and snaps "Guess what?!? His birthday is in FEB too!"
I said oh yeah? pretty cool...
I know right? Who would have thought I was born in FEB... then my boyfriends birthday is in FEB... What are the odds?!
First off I cant seem to wrap my mind around why she thinks its crazy that someone else has their birthday in the same month as her...
Secondly why is she saying "feb"and not February!
She goes on talking about Feb and what a great time it is to be born in Feb and the odds of dating someone who was also born in Feb...
One of her friends comes in and sits in the empty station beside me who has equally terrible eyebrows and asks how her day is going.
My client starts to abruptly yell out
HEY GIRL FRIEND!!!! OH JUST GETTING THE ROYAL TREATMENT DONE...
she is literally talking the way a very flamboyant "queen" would be flipping her wrist back and forth and trying to snap her neck at the same time.
Curious... she wasn't talking like this prior to her friend coming in.
She goes on talking about how amazing her "bf" is while interrupting her friend at every possible chance she gets.
As I'm concentrating on my work just to get her out, I notice a coworker is shampooing her next client behind me talking about how its her birthday.
Immediately my client overheard this part and said "BIRHTDAY GIRLS IN THE HA-HOUSE!!"and starts pumping her fists in the air.
Who the fuck is this crazy brawd?! Were not at the jersey shore...
Uncontrollable out bursts tag teamed with sparatic neck movements.... it all really makes me question if there is something seriously wrong with this girl.
At the end of the cut she asks me where she can get her eyebrows fixed.
I gladly told her where to go.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
cold bath
So today I didn't realize anything was out of the ordinary until one of my coworkers pointed out that the guy (whose hair I was currently shampooing) had an erection.
SHAMPOO OVER!
Try keeping a straight face after that!
During the hair cut he tried to impress me by telling me he just came from court and that he's a lawyer.
He also had terrible oily dandruff.
I felt so dirty after.
SHAMPOO OVER!
Try keeping a straight face after that!
During the hair cut he tried to impress me by telling me he just came from court and that he's a lawyer.
He also had terrible oily dandruff.
I felt so dirty after.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
just plain crazy
I decided to break up this delightful client's experience into two parts. I think that she earned it...
So a few hours go by and sure enough this lady who is on four different mood stabilizers comes back into the shop. I can hardly contain my excitement as I quickly notice that she has company.
This woman has a teen aged, loud mouthed, arrogant daughter.
I'm actually still baffled at how this woman could really care for another being.
So I sit this lady back in my chair and asked her "What were you thinking of for your hair? I was told that you wanted to go a lot shorter."
She replies "I want it all gone, so it is almost buzzed up the back."
Wonderful.
I start cutting her hair as she informally introduces me to her daughter who is obnoxiously smacking her gum and chewing it like a horse.
Everything seems to be fine, almost as if this daughter made the mother sane. That or perhaps she took some medication before she came back out.
Her daughter starts asking the most pointless questions just to irritate the mother for the next twenty minutes like
"weren't you just here?"
"why are you getting your hair cut again?"
"do you have any cigarettes?"
"why can't I have ice cream?"
"why are were here?"
The daughter finally leaves to get her eyebrows waxed after taking $40 out of her mothers wallet.
Her mom continues to pass in and out of consciousness while tilting her head forward only to snap it back, making my job incredibly irritating...
Sure enough her daughter comes back with literally her entire upper face red and splotchy from this eyebrow waxing that I literally had to bite my lip from howling.
The mother didn't seem to notice the daughters botched up wax job nor the fact that her daughter swiped forty dollars out of her wallet for this.
I finally finished up the cut and the lady had a few minor outbursts towards her daughter telling her to "shut up" several times because she wouldn't get her ice cream... who eats ice cream while getting their hair cut?
That is just strange to me.
When I finished this lady's hair cut I showed her the "almost buzzed" back of her hair and prayed to god that I wouldn't have to deal with ever her again.
She thanked me, then started to make her way out of the salon as the duo bitched at each other very loudly like a pair of teenagers.
Second time wasn't as bad as the first.
She was still a treat though.
So a few hours go by and sure enough this lady who is on four different mood stabilizers comes back into the shop. I can hardly contain my excitement as I quickly notice that she has company.
This woman has a teen aged, loud mouthed, arrogant daughter.
I'm actually still baffled at how this woman could really care for another being.
So I sit this lady back in my chair and asked her "What were you thinking of for your hair? I was told that you wanted to go a lot shorter."
She replies "I want it all gone, so it is almost buzzed up the back."
Wonderful.
I start cutting her hair as she informally introduces me to her daughter who is obnoxiously smacking her gum and chewing it like a horse.
Everything seems to be fine, almost as if this daughter made the mother sane. That or perhaps she took some medication before she came back out.
Her daughter starts asking the most pointless questions just to irritate the mother for the next twenty minutes like
"weren't you just here?"
"why are you getting your hair cut again?"
"do you have any cigarettes?"
"why can't I have ice cream?"
"why are were here?"
The daughter finally leaves to get her eyebrows waxed after taking $40 out of her mothers wallet.
Her mom continues to pass in and out of consciousness while tilting her head forward only to snap it back, making my job incredibly irritating...
Sure enough her daughter comes back with literally her entire upper face red and splotchy from this eyebrow waxing that I literally had to bite my lip from howling.
The mother didn't seem to notice the daughters botched up wax job nor the fact that her daughter swiped forty dollars out of her wallet for this.
I finally finished up the cut and the lady had a few minor outbursts towards her daughter telling her to "shut up" several times because she wouldn't get her ice cream... who eats ice cream while getting their hair cut?
That is just strange to me.
When I finished this lady's hair cut I showed her the "almost buzzed" back of her hair and prayed to god that I wouldn't have to deal with ever her again.
She thanked me, then started to make her way out of the salon as the duo bitched at each other very loudly like a pair of teenagers.
Second time wasn't as bad as the first.
She was still a treat though.
Monday, March 7, 2011
crazy for paris
You know when there is a full moon just around the corner when people start to behave a bit more nonchalant.
I'll put you in the scene of my work place going back about a month ago.
It's a regular morning shift until a frantic woman comes in and explains that she needs only a trim because she cant handle her hair any longer.
As I'm washing her hair she explains to me that she was injured in her work place thus putting her on disability due to brain injuries.
I started to feel terrible for her situation until she opened her mouth for the next 40 + minutes.
So much insanity started to spill out of her mouth.
She explained to me that she was put on 4 different mood stabilizers and two different anti-depressants.
Oh boy.... this is going to be a real treat!
So she's finally in my chair and then tells me that as she had said before she would like a trim. she likes the length so I went ahead with this "trim" (all while her head is parallel to the floor some how and I'm certain that she has passed out due to the pharmaceuticals in her system).
After I finish this I ask her how the length of her hair was. She suddenly yells out CHOP IT OFF!
Excuse me?
Besides just nearly giving me a heart attack from her outburst I look at her with a raised eyebrow as I have already pretty much finished her hair cut.
She holds up a magazine in her lap and says "I want this!"
It displayed a completley different short hair cut.
I explain to her that that would be significantly more than just a trim and I went ahead and starting cutting. All while in the back of my mind I fucking hope that she doesn't change her mind in 35 seconds from now and starts screaming.
As I'm doing my job she starts flipping through the hair magazine in a very aggressive manner ripping nearly every page as she does so. Pauses... then smacks the magazine and mutters "Look at how shes staring at me..."
"excuse me?"
"those eyes... shes staring at me... I fucking hate her"
Concern hits me like a ton of bricks as I stop and say "um... who are you talking about...?"
She points to the well known celeberity smiling in the magazine.
Do I dare tell her that this celeberity is actually a photograph and that she is actually smiling at the camera that snapped this shot?
I let it be.
I chuckled and I said "Oh you know... those people in there always have such fake smiles sometimes..."
She responds "She always smiles at me with that slutty look... it makes me so angry... i just want to break her.... I would punch her in the face so hard..."
Needless to say at this point I'm seriously stepping in front of my sheers and razor blade displayed in front of her and turn on the hair drier to mute her out.
I finished the hair cut not saying anymore more to her after this...
I don't think this lady really cared as she seemed to be passing in and out of consciousness while holding up that magazine with that page facing her.
After a good hour has passed I'm so ready to get rid of this lady so I show her the back of her hair.
She says "well its nice but I wanted it shorter..."
Are you FUCKING kidding me...
At this point I said well you can always come back for your next trim and we can go shorter.
(as this woman clearly has the memory of a gold fish... she says one thing then then to only forget what she had previously asked for )
She said thank you because her hair is very difficult to work with as it is thick like oriential hair and it did feel better.
This made me shake my head because this is a caucasian lady with medium thickness hair ... nothing oriential about it.
I just smiled and nodded and away she went.
Thank god.
The phone rings 40 minutes later...
This lady is on the other end. She wants her hair shorter and is coming back to me.
Three hair cuts in one day on one person who is clearly out to lunch...
I'll put you in the scene of my work place going back about a month ago.
It's a regular morning shift until a frantic woman comes in and explains that she needs only a trim because she cant handle her hair any longer.
As I'm washing her hair she explains to me that she was injured in her work place thus putting her on disability due to brain injuries.
I started to feel terrible for her situation until she opened her mouth for the next 40 + minutes.
So much insanity started to spill out of her mouth.
She explained to me that she was put on 4 different mood stabilizers and two different anti-depressants.
Oh boy.... this is going to be a real treat!
So she's finally in my chair and then tells me that as she had said before she would like a trim. she likes the length so I went ahead with this "trim" (all while her head is parallel to the floor some how and I'm certain that she has passed out due to the pharmaceuticals in her system).
After I finish this I ask her how the length of her hair was. She suddenly yells out CHOP IT OFF!
Excuse me?
Besides just nearly giving me a heart attack from her outburst I look at her with a raised eyebrow as I have already pretty much finished her hair cut.
She holds up a magazine in her lap and says "I want this!"
It displayed a completley different short hair cut.
I explain to her that that would be significantly more than just a trim and I went ahead and starting cutting. All while in the back of my mind I fucking hope that she doesn't change her mind in 35 seconds from now and starts screaming.
As I'm doing my job she starts flipping through the hair magazine in a very aggressive manner ripping nearly every page as she does so. Pauses... then smacks the magazine and mutters "Look at how shes staring at me..."
"excuse me?"
"those eyes... shes staring at me... I fucking hate her"
Concern hits me like a ton of bricks as I stop and say "um... who are you talking about...?"
She points to the well known celeberity smiling in the magazine.
Do I dare tell her that this celeberity is actually a photograph and that she is actually smiling at the camera that snapped this shot?
I let it be.
I chuckled and I said "Oh you know... those people in there always have such fake smiles sometimes..."
She responds "She always smiles at me with that slutty look... it makes me so angry... i just want to break her.... I would punch her in the face so hard..."
Needless to say at this point I'm seriously stepping in front of my sheers and razor blade displayed in front of her and turn on the hair drier to mute her out.
I finished the hair cut not saying anymore more to her after this...
I don't think this lady really cared as she seemed to be passing in and out of consciousness while holding up that magazine with that page facing her.
After a good hour has passed I'm so ready to get rid of this lady so I show her the back of her hair.
She says "well its nice but I wanted it shorter..."
Are you FUCKING kidding me...
At this point I said well you can always come back for your next trim and we can go shorter.
(as this woman clearly has the memory of a gold fish... she says one thing then then to only forget what she had previously asked for )
She said thank you because her hair is very difficult to work with as it is thick like oriential hair and it did feel better.
This made me shake my head because this is a caucasian lady with medium thickness hair ... nothing oriential about it.
I just smiled and nodded and away she went.
Thank god.
The phone rings 40 minutes later...
This lady is on the other end. She wants her hair shorter and is coming back to me.
Three hair cuts in one day on one person who is clearly out to lunch...
Saturday, March 5, 2011
05.03.2011
Where to start....
I'm 29, single and a hair stylist.
That's something...Right?
When your a hair stylist you come into contact with some serious characters. People tend to think that they can open up to you just because your holding a very sharp tool close to their proximity and then it all spills out...
Don't get me wrong, I love the occasional crazy; it really livens up my day. However lately I seem to attract a lot of them both while behind the chair as well as being out and about.
I love a good laugh so it can come in handy when life is so serious.
Laura
I'm 29, single and a hair stylist.
That's something...Right?
When your a hair stylist you come into contact with some serious characters. People tend to think that they can open up to you just because your holding a very sharp tool close to their proximity and then it all spills out...
Don't get me wrong, I love the occasional crazy; it really livens up my day. However lately I seem to attract a lot of them both while behind the chair as well as being out and about.
I love a good laugh so it can come in handy when life is so serious.
Laura
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